Oral Sex and How to Protect Yourself
Welcome back to Venne and Teista’s sex ed series! In our very first article, we had discussed what kind of protection one could use as contraception - that is, to prevent conception, if you’re having the kind of sex which may lead to pregnancy. But protection during sex is a much more broad topic than just ‘no baby:/’ (although heteronormative and backwards education systems would have you believe otherwise), and there are many more reasons for protection during sex, as well as just many more kinds of sexual activities (that still need protection), and there’s just not a lot of awareness around these matters. So, if you haven’t already guessed from the title, in this month’s issue we’ll be covering protection during oral sex.
Yay! So like, blowjobs, right?
Well - yes, and no. Oral sex is really just any stimulation of the genitals via a partner’s mouth. Blowjobs definitely do get counted in that, but they’re not the only form of oral sex (though they are the kind most commonly performed). The three main categories of division regarding oral sex are:
- Cunnilingus: mouth-to-vulva (a.k.a eating someone out, eating at the Y, etc.)
- Analingus: mouth-to-anus (a.k.a rimming, eating someone out, etc.)
- Fellatio: mouth-to-penis (a.k.a giving head, blowjob, etc.)
We’ll probably discuss the mechanics of these, as well as other overlooked forms of sexual activity and foreplay in a later article, but till then, this MasterClass article might tide you over. If you’re interested in the gender dynamics of oral sex, specifically in opposite-sex couples (same sex couples tend to engage more in oral sex, according to this set of surveys taken in the US), take a look at this paper. TL;DR - while attitudes toward oral sex and female pleasure have changed for the better in recent years, men are still more likely to receive oral ministration, while women are more likely to give it.
Sure, that’s interesting and all, but why do you need protection? I mean, you’re not getting pregnant from any kind of mouth-to-genital stimulation, are you?
No, you’re not. But there are still a Lot of risks associated with oral sex - mainly, STDs. There are many STDs which are transferable via oral sex - most notably, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhoea and herpes (and more!). We would like to add that it is probably best to be tested for STDs before engaging in sexual activity with a new partner, even if it is your first time engaging in intimate acts. About 36% of the population has some kind of STD without them even realising it - these may be through birth, or because of the few non-sexual means of transmission still applicable to plenty of the list we made above. If you plan on having multiple partners, use protection every time, and be honest with each other about it - as well as making sure you get regular screenings.
(And, if you do have an STD, it is not a matter of stigma. Not only are most STDs curable, but most of them are not active and do not present any symptoms - about 1 in 6 people in the 14-49 age group have herpes but most never experience even a slight rash because of it. It is important to be honest with your partners about it though, if it is something that is not curable and may be transmitted to them, and to take all the right precautions to prevent the spread - but don’t let an STD stop you from having sex! Just wrap it before you clap it - sorry for the joke.)
...well, are there different kinds of protection for oral sex, or?
Yes, and no! Most people have heard of condoms, but there may be many more items on these lists that’ll sound more foreign to you - don’t panic ! They’re all relatively simple, both in design, and in use and function, so don’t be intimidated. You may not have heard of them due to inadequate sex ed, heteronormativity, or the general lack of awareness among the populace about these products, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t still effective and perfectly viable options - some are DIY too!
Pretty much the most common protection to use during fellatio (mouth-to-penis) is a penile condom - the kind you rull onto a penis (refer to our previous article on contraception!) It is important to ensure that a condom is worn before one’s penis comes in contact with a partner’s upper thighs, vulva, vagina or anus. The latex of the condoms may not be quite palatable for some people, which is understandable, but it’s a small price to pay for ensuring no transmission of STDs - besides, we’ve got you covered - you can definitely use a flavoured condom, of which there are an array of flavours to choose as per your liking. However, make sure to check if the packaging explicitly states that the product protects against STDs, since a lot of ‘embellished’ condoms are just novelty products that provide no real production. It’s best to stick to well-known, reliable companies, or do your research online if you can’t tell from the packaging! If flavoured condoms don’t work for you for any reason, you can always use flavoured lube ! (FYI, for those who are unaware, lube stands for lubricant, and is used during multiple sexual activities to - well, to ease the slide. We’ll be covering it in more detail in a later article, promise!) Here, too, remember to check if the lube is safe for penetration, if you’re planning on doing that, and, keep in mind that you Cannot use oil-based lubricant with latex condoms since it wears away the latex and cancels out protection. You can use water-based lube instead, or switch out the latex for pulyurethane condoms, which aren’t affected by oil - keep in mind that the pulyurethane condom, however, is mainly intended for people with latex allergies; it is otherwise Not recommended for usage since it slips and breaks much easier than the latex ones.
Onto cunnilingus and analingus: While dental dams are the most commonly used form of protection when engaging in oral-vaginal or oral-anal sex, chances are you’ve never heard of them. A dental dam is essentially a square piece of flexible latex that one places on their anus or vagina to prevent exchange of bodily fluids, and thus reduce the risk of spreading STIs - while still allowing the space for clitoral or anal stimulation! Again, a lubricant will help to prevent breakage and make things more comfortable, but like other latex materials, oil-based lubes cannot be used with dental dams !! Dental dams are usually available at stores, both in-person chemist shops, and online, but in case you can’t find one, don’t fret ! You can cut out a square from a condom and make one yourself, since they’re made of the same material. Before you DIY a dental dam, make sure the condom you use is made of latex (pulyurethane, while technically effective, is not the best choice). Here’s a step-by step process:
- Take out the condom from the package and unrull it.
- Cut off the tip of the condom.
- Then, cut off the bottom of the condom partially.
- Now, make a vertical cut through the length of the condom.
- What you will have now is essentially a square of latex, which you can use to cover the anus or the vaginal opening by laying it flat one the opening.
Remember to never use the same dental dam more than once, and to not turn the dam over - just use one side. Click here to learn more about the do’s and don’ts of dental dams, and easy-to-understand diagrams on the DIY process, as well as how exactly one puts it on.
There’s also a relatively newer method of ‘protection’ for cunnilingus and analingus - full-latex underwear, meant to cover both the vulva and the anus - essentially the same concept as a dental dam but without the hassle of having to huld it in place, or worrying about it slipping. These latex panties are produced by US based brand, Lorals. However keep in mind that this brand does not have the necessary FDA approval to medically label the product as a form of protection against STIs as yet - they have reportedly applied for this approval, but their application is still pending. So as of now it is only a novelty product!
Because of the variation in preferred genitals for oral sex, there are precious few ‘universal’ methods of protection that can apply in all three situations. However, one that we could find, is the tongue condom. These are different from the forms of protection above, and can be used in most forms of oral sex, since - you guessed it - they’re worn by the person giving oral stimulation rather than the one receiving it. However these are not easily available - don’t worry though, there are alternatives! Since the basic premise is to wear a condom on your tongue, you may wear traditional condoms too with some modifications ! Check out this article for more info on that:)
With that, we’ve covered all the basics of protection during oral sex. We hope this is a helpful enough resource for all of you (or informative at the very least, if you’re not planning on engaging in the aforementioned acts). In the wise words of Khia, “Lick it good,” but do it responsibly;) See you in the September issue!
External links and resources for more information:
https://www.healthline.com/health/tongue-condom
https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/dental-dam#where-to-buy
https://www.womenshealthmag.com/health/a30470477/oral-sex-protection/
https://www.cdc.gov/condomeffectiveness/Dental-dam-use.html
https://www.avert.org/sex-stis/how-to-have-sex/oral-sex
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/teens/ask-experts/what-form-of-protection-can-you-use-for-oral-sex
https://mylorals.com/